Redefine Modern Romance this Valentines Day in San Diego

Times they are a changing; the designated roles of men and women are definitely different today than in generations past.

The evolution of gender roles, though positive in many ways, has caused some disconnects between girls and guys, seemingly leaving enough space for romance to fly out the window.

This Valentine's Day in San Diego, it's important to make sure you are on the same romantic wavelength as your significant other.

The result of much research, this dating crash course reveals what the opposite sex wants from you, and how you can redefine modern romance this Valentine's Day, and every day.

Men: Creatively court her. Forget instant gratification and actually take the time to playfully and creatively pursue and court a woman. Be a gentlemen and put in effort to let her know she is special and worthy of your time and imagination. Your small dose of hard work will pay off big.

Men: Demonstrate more cultural awareness and intelligence: Sure you know the score of the last football game, but tune in more to the news and current events, read up on worldly concerns, and learn more about local culture so that you can mentally stimulate her, too. Women are very turned-on by men who can demonstrate intelligence and cultural awareness.

Men: Do unexpected things at unexpected times. Women love the mental stimulation that surprises bring, so give it to her - not just on Valentines Day but all the time. Leave romantic notes or surprises in unexpected places, like in her windshield or purse. Put chocolate kisses in the pockets of the coat you know she's going to wear, send her flowers for no reason, or shoot her a clever text in the middle of the day just to make her smile.

Men: Demonstrate your masculinity. Although women have more power than they used to, some things still remain the same: Women don't want a wishy-washy guy. Women want a man to be able to take charge in situations, make fast decisions when called for, occasionally plan the dates and choose the entertainment for the night. Call her rather than sending a text, and show her that you can protect and support her through your words and actions.

Men: Spend more time on sensual foreplay. Guys, it's not about the end goal. You will find it to be much more enjoyable for both of you if you spend more time teasing and exciting her and creating that anticipation that she craves through physical and mental foreplay.

Women: Embrace your femininity. Independence doesn't mean aggressiveness. Men want to see ladies exude that softer, feminine energy that they are innately attracted to, rather than the aggressive and competitive energy that many modern self-sufficient women give off.

Women: Show your appreciation for romantic gestures. When men do thoughtful or romantic things for you, make sure to express your acknowledgement and appreciation, rather than meeting them with criticism or disappointment which stifles their desire to do more things like that.

Women: Meet men half-way when it comes to dating. Treating men with respect, offering to share the dinner tab or help with the cost of dates, and communicating clearly with him rather than expecting him to read your mind are simple ways you can help make the dating process something he enjoys doing.

Women: Know how to "shut off" your work life. If you're a career-minded girl, make sure to put away your phones and PDAs on dates. Resist the urge to talk all about your career, accomplishments or new business deals. When you're on a date, just be present with him. Demonstrate that you can balance your career and personal life.

Both: Treat her like a lady and let him be a man! Although times may be different, show her that chivalry is not dead and actually treat her like a special lady through gentleman gestures like opening their doors, paying for valet or cab fare, walking on the outside, avoiding swearing like a sailor, checking to make sure she gets home alright, and calling when you say you will call. And ladies, allow your man to be a man and do the little chivalrous things he wants to do, like opening doors, fixing your tire, paying the tab, and planning an evening. Don't treat those things as insulting, and don't insist on having total control - it just emasculates him.

Learn about DeAnna Lorraine's creative "Perfect Date" packages, Love Letter writing services and other unique Date Coaching services offered exclusively for San Diego Valentine's Day season at www.DeannaLorraine.com, or tune into her own Talk Radio show Thursdays at 6pm on AM 1000 (KCEO) for hot dating, sex & love advice! Contact her directly at Deanna@DeannaLorraine.com.