Many single guys in San Diego ask me where to meet local single girls.
Let's start at the beginning: every girl wants to have some guy come out of nowhere and sweep her off her feet. Some of us are more jaded about the reality of that actually happening, but I don't think any of us would complain if it did. You can be that guy. Go where the San Diego girls go.
The local ladies frequent San Diego bars - Stingaree, JBar, Envy at Ivy, and Sweetwater Saloon at the Hard Rock are all babe magnets. Also check the malls in San Diego, such as Horton Plaza, Fashion Valley, and UTC in La Jolla. For a more casual, everyday experience, look in your own backyard on your college campus and your neighborhood coffee shops.
While women definitely hit up the gym, San Diego gyms are one place I wouldn't recommend for picking up girls. If she has her headphones on and face buried in a magazine, chances are she wants to be left alone. Although, if a girl has make-up on, she probably wants someone to notice her.
Embrace the Familiar
Find your favorite places to go and get to know everyone there. People who are social are always meeting new people and introducing old friends to new friends. Establish yourself at a place you like to go, where everyone knows you, and meet new girls there. Introducing a new girl you meet to other groups of people creates value by showing you are a social person.
Escape the Friend Zone
Stay out of the friend zone. Once you are in, it's hard to get out. I hear a lot of single guys in San Diego say things like: "We are great friends but I don't know if she wants anything more..." usually she doesn't, because you already blew it. You must establish yourself as interested in her as more then a friend from the beginning.
One of the best ways to do this is to touch her. Don't molest her in the club or start grinding on her without asking, that's a great way to get a drink poured on you or thrown out of the club. I'm talking about normal friendly touch. If you watch guys who are successful with women they generally touch a lot and most of them don't even realize they do it. It is natural and appealing to women.
Another way to ensure you never start out in the friend zone is tease her. Be aware there is stuff out there that tells you to be rude to girls to get their attention and lower their value. That doesn't work with girls who are secure with themselves. The right kind of teasing is fun for everyone, and it has her know you like her. If it works she will usually be laughing at what you said, and might challenge you back with some witty teasing of her own.
Stay Relaxed
Don't be too overly excited to talk to a girl. This is known as eager beaver syndrome, and it plagues many men in San Diego. Talk to her with the same level of confidence you talk to your guy friends, and at the same time allow yourself to be interested in her as a woman. Whatever you do don't be weird around her just because she is pretty. Attractive women can judge in seconds if the guy they are talking to is used to talking to attractive women.
If you forget everything else I said, remember this... have fun! Girls head out to San Diego bars and clubs to have fun. Being a fun, entertaining person is one of the most redeeming qualities a man can have. People want to be around people who are having fun.
Insider Tip: Don't ever use a pick-up line you read, unless you get it signed off by three girls first. These store-bought lines are usually lame and fall flat because they lack intelligence and creativity.
Jamie Thompson is a well known San Diego dating coach and has helped many single guys in San Diego achieve their dating goals. Jamie is offering free San Diego dating consultations right now. If you are interested, email her at jamie@jamielovesyou.com. For more information, visit jamielovesyou.com.
As a DiscoverSD Insider, dating in San Diego is made easy.
